I do wonder whether all members do feel welcome as some don't seem to stay around for too long?

Reflecting further on this thread and going back to Miss Pink's original question made me stop and think more generally about why some people stay with us and some move on. It made me realise that whilst some people had mentioned having received very friendly PMs and how important this had been in making them feel welcome and was one of the factors that had encouraged them to stay with us, nobody had mentioned the negative factor of having received 'flaming' PMs that had driven them away from the board. This isn't surprising because of course if it had they wouldn't be here to discuss it! But having been on the receiving end of such a PM I now wonder how much of this goes on without the rest of us realising?

In my case it happened quite a while after I'd initially become active on HT and whilst I was upset at first by the personally attacking tone of it, I knew that it was far from representative of the way that people behaved here. I shrugged it off, thought 'Ah well, clearly touched a nerve there' and moved on. It helps that I work in a profession where ideas and views are debated vigorously and one also has to get used to receiving and dealing with negative feedback and so I probably have developed a thicker skin than many. Perhaps this has given me a tendency to assume that others can deal with hearing things that they'd rather not be told about their complaint? I need to think about that. But I now wonder whether I would have reacted the same way if I was a newer poster who hadn't got to feel valued by a lot of other posters at the point they received such a PM? I know that I could have referred the incident to the Mods but chose not to, I simply decided to let things lie and to try and remember to never respond directly to a query or post from that member in the future in case it provoked a similar vitriolic response. However, I suspect that if it happened earlier I might well have felt too intimidated to ever post ever again something were I disagreed with somebody and I would have just disappeared. Rather like I have from TA I suppose.

SM

I apologise for not posting any responses sooner, but been a bit poorly

I have not read all the posts that have been put, I will go back and read them and then post again if I have further comments, but I wanted to post this before.

The reason for posting this to be honest, is mainly summed up in jimd-f first post, where he stated that some new posters come on here look for information, and ask their questions and some answers that are given to them by quite a few regular members make me cringe too, and I think thank goodness I was not answered or had posts in like that to me otherwise I may not have wanted to hang around.

By and large I don't think that this is the case and of course we all have our bad days, but I think we need to post to people how we would like to receive posts, friendly and polite. If people post on other forums too does it really matter, if they have arrived here, maybe they have not received help, guidance or a friendly bunch of forum folk before - but they could here.

I know sometimes the same questions are asked time and time again, but don't forget 'we' probably asked those questions too and thankfully people were probably pleasant and helpful to us so we stayed around.

I think the Mods do a great Job - I am one myself on another forum so I do appreciate the work that is put in and they cannot always see curt and offhand remarks.

'Tone' I think is always so difficult to get right in written form, especially in a forum where we try to answer in short sentances it can come across as offhand, when it probably isn't meant that way at all.

Thanks

Val under your avatar it tells you when you joined HT x

I'm a brand new member today so hopefully in a few days / weeks I can answer this thread in more detail.
Everytime we go away I research via HT.
When I get a sneaky 5 mins online and my mind thinks of holidays I surf HT
I have had loads of invaluable advice and tips gleaned from reading all the posts over the years and yet it was only today I actually registered and asked a question - Why I hear you thinking - a combination of not really wanting to look stupid for asking a question that could have been answered previously and I have missed the thread and also not wanting to sound like some of the 'sharp sounding ' posts I have read.
My first post was indeed a question which I know some people will think has been answered but that was over 2 years ago and things change and I'm looking forward to see if I get an answer.
I think the worst thing will be not to get an answer - of any kind!
So let's see how this new member feels about joining HT, posting on HT, contributing to HT and how other members react to her posting on HT.

Hi DragonBev, and welcome as a fully fledged member of HT. Now you've taken the plunge, I hope that there'll be plenty of people on here who will be able to help you with any enquiries, and that you'll offer any help you can to others as well.

Hi DragonBev to HT, in case it has not already been said. This forum is indeed a source for all sorts of information, from far and wide from 'real' people too with our own experiences so I hope you find it a helpful and friendly place. Sometimes if the forum has lots of topics the move quite quickly and your thread will go further down and might not be seen, that happens I'm afraid. It would not hurt if that happens to add another post to your thread, just saying bumping in the hope someone sees - or something like that.

Pinky

Thank you for making me feel welcome and I shall keep an eye on my post - I really hope someone can give me an answer - if only to stop me from dithering over the tranfers and allow me to enjoy HT browsing

Tut Tut Pinky encouraging a new member to break the T&Cs

13. Bumping of topics is not allowed. If a member can answer your question they will, bumping is not necessary.

Welcome to our community Bev

I'm sure Miss Pink was only trying to help me and I promise not to 'bump posts' thanks nickmacuk. It's great to see replies to the posts and to be a part of it.

Thank you Helen T and yes I will always contribute where possible and offer advice when I can

I now think of HT as part of the holiday prep - gleaning as much as possible and enjoying all the banter

So Miss Pink on my first day and on my first posts 'I FEEL VERY WELCOME'

Great Stuff

Thank you Pinky for pointing out to me when I joined. I know it says under my avatar..but when I am writing a post I cannot see my avatar..and I was here for a while before I actually joined!!

hi new here so i will let you know!!!!

lilyflipflop

Welcome to HT lilyflipflop

Sorry I won't be much help in answering your particular questions on bikini, tankini or swimsuit

Graham

Hi and welcome to HT Lilyflipflop. by the way, love your username

Hi shirley h

thanks for your welcome Ive joined in a few threads and have been made to feel very welcome. Glad you like the user name Ive been reading the greek islands thread with interest and notice you post in there often, im sure i will be asking lots of questions in there as i am visiting kos for the 1st time this year.

Kiltman- by the time you have followed the bikini thread you will be an expert in ladies swimwear-gok wan eat your heart out many thanks for your welcome.

lilyflipflop

Kiltman- by the time you have followed the bikini thread you will be an expert in ladies swimwear-gok wan eat your heart out many thanks for your welcome.

Going a bit and I will have a severe word with myself however I have said before that if I come back I am going to come back as Gok Wan

lilyflipflop

welcome to the forums, I too am returning to Kos this year [4th time] enjoy the forums

yasus
wizard

wizard

thanks for the welcome. Im sure you will be of help when im asking umpteen questions about my holiday to kos

Ive been made to feel very welcome on here today. I hope i continue to have a good experience of HT.

Lilyflipflop

Lilyflipflop (ooh, that makes me (feel all summery lol), I don't pretend to be an expert on Greece but I've been to a few of the islands and will continue to do so as it's my favourite destination.
Speak soon

Hello to dragonbev and lillyflipflopfrom me ! welcome to H.T , you'll find a wealth of information here and some crackingly funny threads, so enjoy !!