Hi Dawnie.
I have looked at your post and I've given a lot of thought into what I would recommend....having been to both places.
If I was a travel advisor and you came into my shop and explained that you are a 40 year old woman who is travelling on her own and wanting a stress free/chill-out place etc, then I would recommend the Costa del Sol.
I would recommend Torremolinos, but Torremolinos is a big place with vast beaches and each district is different to the next one, therefore, I would specifically recommend the area between Torremolinos town centre and Benalmadena Marina.
The area is basically known as La Carihuela/Montemar and Carihuela is a Spanish fishing village, which is managing to hold onto its roots and charms.
There are 3 and 4 star front line hotels, a very long flat promenade, plenty of shops and bars, and a really laid back atmosphere, but should you want to boogie the night away, Benalmadena Marina is only a short stroll away and here you have the more loud and energetic type of entertainment, or Torremolinos town centre is about 30 mins away walking distance, or about 6 or 7 euros in a taxi.
From here, if you fancy exploring other places, there are numerous travel agencies offering very reasonable priced day trips to places like Ronda, Sevilla, Cordoba, Granada and Gibraltar and this is an excellent way (although a long day for some of the excursions) to get a glimpse of places that you may never get the opportunity to see again or might like to go and visit in the future.
If you fancy a day out locally, you can catch the train that runs from Fuengirola to Malaga, you can't go wrong because there is only one train that runs on this line and for a few euros visit places like Malaga City, which is vastly overlooked by most tourists staying on the Costa's, or from Fungirola catch the bus to Mijas and within 20/30 mins you will be in a white village in the mountains, and although it's become tourist trap, it's a lovely place to visit for a few euros.
The beach whilst not the same type of sand as Benidorm, is well kept and very clean and the sun-beds come with the coconut type parasols, they also have very thick and comfortable mattresses on them to spend a stress free holiday reading a book and listening to the waves"¦.. something that Benidorm doesn't have.
I know a woman from Belgium who is probably in her late 30's early 40's and has been going to the same hotel that I usually stay in La Carihuela for 13 years and always the same 3 weeks
She walks late at night on the promenade on her own amongst the Spanish families who frequent this resort and nobody thinks nothing about it"¦.well, maybe the males might fancy their chances.
But the type of clothes she wears (very short skirts and not much material in the tops) and the way she strolls up and down the promenade in her own little world, you could be forgiven for thinking she was a prostitute, and in all honesty, I think if she walked around Benidorm like that, late at night, she WOULD be looking like a prostitute.
I have never travelled on my own, but as a woman into today's Europe, your personal safety has to be considered, and whilst no place is safe, there are some places which seem to be safer than others, therefore between the two resorts, I honestly would recommend La Carihuela, I personally think you will feel more safe and feel more comfortable taking an after dinner stroll in the laid back, family orientated resort.....Laid back, not dead.:smile:
I love both of the Costa's and the only thing they have in common is that they are in Spain, Andalucia is different to Valencia, the customs, food and even the dialect are different.
What I love about Andalucia is walking on the promenade and smelling the sardinas as they are being charcoal grilled on the open fires on the beach, next to the chiringuitos (beach bars) and smelling the aroma as it whaffs through the hot evening air, and if you love sea food"¦....La Carihuela is THE place.
It is my opinion, but that's where I'd send you if you walked into my shop, after considering your requirements.
I know it seems like I have dissed down Benidorm, but I love Benidorm for other reasons, like walking in the Sierra Helada mountains and the diversity of the town.
Maybe if you spend some time looking at all the videos I have made in both the Costa Blanca video library and the Costa del Sol video library, this may help you decide.
Hope this has helped
Sanji
and am trying to decide whether to go to Benidorm or the Costa del Sol. I am planning a stress break, my husband is staying home to look after the family.
First 3 weeks in June. 
