A very thought provoking pot Bam and one I'm sure a lot of old hands or long stayers would agree with. We have all thought we had special friends especially among the shack staff but its only after a few years that you realise you are only a special friend for your two week stay. Over the years I,ve carted samsonite cases , cd players, phones ,cameras, and so on till I realised I was just one of many taking out the same stuff every fortnight. Yes there are exceptions to this and I'm sure the posts will flood in saying they are without exception wonderfull people, but the majority of regulars that have been going for years will see the sense in your post, What you say is right, they dont need us so much, now the domestic tourism is booming, this fact may be reflected in the recent drive against non indians buying property, and the increasing difficulties in getting a visa Alan

You are so right,i love goa so i am going to make the best of the next few years,with the increase of internal tourists and rightly so,i was told by hotel owner last year that they get more money from indian tourists than travel companys,and the indian people who can afford to go on holiday increases ten fold each year,i think the only way in the future is DIY,also the talk of oppening up,further up north might be a good thing,but i think we will get costa del sol prices.I aggree what you say about every one wanting to be your friend,i am friendly to them but that is it ,they are still the most friendly people i no,wealth always brings change.

I agree there may be some people, who as you say, are not the "friends" you thought they were - nut there are so many genuine people too.

We have never taken anything out with us as gifts unless it has been framed photos we have taken of our friends and their family or a small meaningful gift. None of our true friends have ever asked us for anything - and this is what distinguises them from the not so true friends! We take it in turns to call/get calls about once a month and I hear regularly from a Kashmiri friend we meet in Goa even when he is back in Kashmir or Manali.

What I am trying to say is that there are genuine/non genuine people everywhere - we don't always get it right - but common sense helps!

TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU VODKA SUNDAE,
i have expierienced both sides of that coin. it is very upsetting when the ones you consider to be your friends, ask for some thing that is quite outragous. like a £1000 on one occasion!!! but we have friends out there who asked for nothing exept our friendship in the 10 years or so we have been going there. (if they are going to ask for anything, they are being very patient).
my prophecy is :- you can't tar everyone with the same brush!!!
BOB

I agree with vodka sundae none of our friends have perstered us .We are fortunate in that wev'e never given anything other than token gifts and our friendship and if asked for money as we were by one alcholic beach shack seller a short sharp NO worked, Not had a problem so far but I have noticed the almost childlike naivity (is that spelling right?) in the way the Goans boast about what they have been given by their western friends.
cheers Lyn

I have been asked to bring things to Goa before, but said politely no. I still enjoy talking to that person, but regard them as a friendly aquaintance rather than a good friend. Maybe that's the difference?

To be honest these kind of posts do make me think a bit. The friends I have made are 'out of state' beach sellers, I know these people are frowned on by many. However, one particular family I have been friends with now for 14 years, having met them as a little gang of rag tag children aged between 4 and 9yrs old sellling their little bits and pieces on the beach.
When they were little I used to buy them food and a drink every day,kitted them out in a new outfit, a mini bus ride to Mapusa with my little gang for a day out and just gave them a few rupees to take home to fenni dependant dad. Their Mum is a lovely person and was always very grateful for the things for the children.
As they have grown up gifts have changed, I generally do one special gift that will benefit them all, a fridge, a TV etc. They have never asked for anything, I set a certain amount aside of my holiday spends for it and it certainly gives me probably more pleasure in giving to them than the other way round.
It doesnt matter to me if I am not their only 'special' friend, they are my friends and I will never forget the second year I was there this little ragamuffin group of children haring across the beach with beaming smiles and arms wide open shouting Mama Carol, they were little kids, it was genuine, and bought me to tears.
Now they are grown up I am still their Mama Carol, they ring me regularly when I am at home, I am invited to their homes when I am in Goa. I don't doubt they have other special friends. they could have 10 such friends buying a fridge for all I know - it doesnt matter to me. They have made my life happier for having the pleasure of knowing them and being a little part of their life.

That was lovely! It's nice to hear people's stories and really reminds me of what Goa and it's people are :-) This story (and others) just show that you can make some of the best/most loyal friends in the world, eventhough you don't see them all the time. Hard to explain to people who have never been.

spot on Roxey, Ido the same a you, plus a bottle of whiskey for the dad