Hi there
We got married in Calabria last September and had a fantastic time! It was really Italian, and no English/American tourists (unlike Sorrento where you could not move for them!). The scenery is breathtaking, the weather very warm (as its so far south) and the people amazing. I can really recommend it, and because it is not touristy (yet, anyway) the prices are a great deal cheaper than most other parts of Italy. This extends to accomodation, food and drink (delicious local specialities!).
We stayed in Praia a Mare, a lovely little Italian seaside town with a mountain backdrop. You can visit various charming places along the coast, or drive into the hills and see the most amazing mountain villages, there are also loads of national parks where you can do watersports, horseriding, hiking etc, if you are that way inclined.
Do not pay any attention to the horror stories, we had NO problems, and neither did our guests, it is perfectly civilised, and some parts are quite upmarket. The only place anybody had any kind of crime experience was en route in Naples, which you should be careful of (assuming you plan to fly to Naples?)
You are right though, nobody speaks English, but should we expect them to?? We do not speak Italian, but we took a very useful dictionary and phrasebook and managed perfectly well. Its amazing what you can pick up in just a week, I dont think you will need to learn that much Italian to be honest.
The only problem I foresee for you is that I would say you definately need a car. We drove from Naples to Calabria and there was no problem (although if you cant drive it wont be possible I guess). You can get a train, and its not expensive, but transport in that area is very limited and you will not get to see most of the best stuff without a car. We were strongly advised to hire a car, and to be honest could not have managed without one. Perhaps some parts of Calabria are more well served with transport than others, and somebody else may have a different experience, but that was ours.
I would certainly recommend it though!
Good luck