Glynis,
Monte Gordo has something for everyone. Loads of pubs and restaurants where you can sit and watch the world go by. It has the most fabulous beach which stretches for miles and miles in both directions. The only downside is that it does have some high buildings which spoils it just a little. The promenade is very flat making it suitable for those with walking difficulties (or maybe for those who have been in the pub?) It is just a stones throw from Vila Real Santo Antonio which has loads of shops selling hardware and linens.....from there you cross the border to Spain.
My preference (as you will have gathered) is a small villge called Cabanas (5 mins drive from the historical town of Tavira, which is reported to be the nicest town in the Algarve). In Cabanas you have a good selection of bars and restaurants and is a really small, typical fishing village which still has it's charm. To get to the beach, you take a little boat across the river (1 euro return) and there, like everywhere else, you can walk for miles on end. I would not describe it as "dead" but lively it is not .....more calm and laid back. Maybe it might be a little quiet for you but it does have 2 pubs that do the "karaoke" and other entertainment till 2am or so. That is the only night life as such in Cabanas. We like to people watch in the local pubs on the waterfront.
On the eastern side you also have the nature reserve area of Castro Marim which is lovely and well worth a visit.
At the end of the day, drive around and get a "feel" for the places that you visit, then make up your own mind.
If you don't like Blackpool type hols, then I would avoid Albufeira and the "strip" areas as I, personally, find them overcrowded and commercialised......I apologise to all of you who love this area, I am merely saying it is not for me although twenty years ago I frequented it and loved it, but it has changed.
Any other info you require, just ask and I will help if I can.
I must say I am becoming addicted to the site as I find it a great source for information and the patter is not too bad either!!!
Pat