Hi Janey,

With regard to your query re taxis, it's very easy and common to arrange for the taxi driver who has taken you somewhere to either wait for you, or if it's a longish wait, to arrange for them to return at an agreed tiome to pick you up. Also, araound Kololi there were always taxis cruising around looking for 'fares' when I was there and so there should be no need to worry about having to walk home in the dark.

As for your other queries, I think that you have to ask yourself what you would do here and apply your own common sense. Would you be happy for your daughters here to go off on their own with people they'd met throught the Internet and about whom you knew nothing except what they'd told your daughters in emails or chat rooms? I don't think I would and would want to exercise some caution by ensuring that I was present when they first met and to perhaps be prepared to chaperone them until I was absolutelyy sure that they were going to be safe. Similarly, would you arrange to meet someone in their own home on the basis of perhaps replying to a personal or 'lonely hearts' ad here? The general advice here would be to arrange a first meeting in a public place and to only go to someone's home once you were sure about the situation.

The Gambians are a very friendly people and you're probably no more nor no less likely to come a cropper there as you are here but equally you need to take the same precautions there as you would here with regard to your personal safety. And it is worth bearing in mind that marriage to a UK passport holder can literally be the passport to a better life for many Gambian men. I don't know how old you are but given the age of your daughters would hazard the guess that you're probably in your 30s? So when a young man 10 years or more your junior starts paying you attention (and they will!), enjoy the flattery but recognise it for what it is and don't take it too seriously. There's many a woman out there who has and has experienced great heartache as a result.

Please don't be put off by any of the above, the Gambia is an amazing country but not at all like the resorts on the Med and the culture is very different. So, having met them in a public place first, if you do feel safe then do go and visit the people you have been in contact with in their homes (but do be prepared for levels of poverty that are unimaginable to many of us in the UK). It will be a genuinely new and worthwhile experience but equally make sure you don't leave your commonsense behind in your hotel room and trust your instincts. A good rule of thumb is always to ask your self 'Would I do this at home?' and if the answer is 'probably not' then you should think carefully about whether you should do it there either.

SM

PS It's worth bearing in mind that the majority of the population in the Gambia is Moslem and to remember that once outside of the hotel complexes this is a factor to be born in mind. There is the assumption on the part of some, though not all Gambian men, that western European women are 'easy' and looking for sex so it would probably be worth ensuring that your daughters realise that things that would not be a problem at home could possibly be interpreted somewhat differently there.

Thank you for your advice, I was not going to let the girls go anywhere on their own I would be with them and if I meet these people it will be near where I am staying first anyway. I just wondered if they could be genuine as it would be a shame not to meet their families as I think it would be a good way for my girls to see how they live. The two daughters I am taking are my youngest 2 so not quite as young as 30 lol but I am a very friendly person and i really hope this does not get me into trouble. I am not going out there to find a new man I am still coming to terms with the loss of my husband and felt this would be a nice break for me to get away from everything for a while. A friend was supposed to have been coming with me but unfortunately he cant make it now otherwise I would have not booked going to the gambia as it does sound a bit worrying. I have made some friends on here who are going to be there the same time as me so I do have a bit of back up.

Hi Janey,

Just like here, some of the people you'll meet on your holiday will be genuine and possibly some won't - the best thing is to trust your own intuition. I travelled to the Gambia on my own as a single woman - as I often do - and, yes, I did get 'hit' on a few times but that's happened to me on other holidays and in hotels the world over too. And the last time was last weekend in Perth, Scotland at a conference I was attending in connection with my work! A bit of harmless flirtation over the dinner table enlived an otherwise boring formal dinner with indifferent food. I knew that's what it was and so did he and I made it clear that I wasn't looking for anything more. You'll no doubt encounter something similar in the Gambia and it will I'm sure be accepted with the same good-natured shrug and smile which carries the implicit message that he can't be blamed for trying and that hopefully no offence has been taken on either side.

I can appreciate that in your situation when you've been used to being part of a couple for such a long time that learning how to be a 'singleton' again can feel scary but the Gambia is no more dangerous than any other holiday destination and being firm and clear about your boundaries will be respected. The biggest hassle always comes from people who are wanting to sell you something and the best way of dealing with that is to walk away if you're just not interested or to haggle, haggle and then haggle some more if you are. The rule of thumb that worked for me is to start off with a preposterously low figure compared to the asking price and expect to move up so that you finally pay around 30-50% of the original asking price. But even if you do pay the original asking price it will more than likely still be a bargain by our standards.

The weather at this time of year will be really warm without being overly humid and climate wise it is a good time to go. You'll come back with a tan that will have everybody green with envy at over the Christmas season. Go expecting somewhere different and a set of new experiences and you won't be disappointed. If you get the chance certainly go and see one of the schools and the trip which includes a visit to a batik and tie-dye 'factory' is certainly worth it to. You'll come back with a set of holiday memories that will never leave you.

SM