Strawberry is actually posting from a position of knowledge from having been in a multicultural relationship for years. So why is that shocking and why do you distrust her advice?

As for bluepeter saying that people are all posting from heresay and then encouraging you all in your relationships with your Turkish chancers, well quite honestly whatever strawberry and I post he takes up a contrary stance because he dosen't like us, hardly an objective perspective ! He resents the fact that strawberry has more knowledge of what goes on in Turkey than someone like him who goes on a couple of holidays a year.

If we were telling you to marry your Turkish boyfriend he would be telling you not to.

Think I will leave this as well now, its going round in circles, but I dont suppose this will be the last word on the topic.

Good Luck, you may need it.

Doe

Doep i have had just about enough of your comments about me i will be taking it up with the mods, if you look at the majority of the posts then you will see that a lot of them is hearsay ,as for strawberry knowing better than anyone else ,i would accept that if her relationship had gone wrong ,she states it has not , so therefor she is basing her stories on what other people tell her , (hearsay )no matter how you try to justify it ,strawberry's posts contain to me a sense of bitterness ,not as in somebody who is in a relationship with a turkish man but the opposite .According to her every man who takes his wife into a bar in turkey should be frightened to go to the toilet in case the waiter passes her a phone number and ends up around the back for a knee jerker ,her words .You and strawberry have constantly argued against the people who have positive relationships,i myself know of eight couples who are of a mixed turkish scottish nationality and all of them have lasted for years . As for not liking you i do not even know you .

Bluepeterno1

I don't distrust her advice or i wouldn't have asked for it, i'm merely trying to decide whether i'm wasting my time or not but since these posts have greatly affected my feelings towards my boyfriend and even going to turkey excuse my questioning of peoples views...
And ''good luck, you may need it'' is a bit of a harsh comment. It is easy to see on your very first visit to turkey, as i did, that there is something not right about the way some of the men go on, which is why i hate that people who have spent any length of time in turkey feel they are in a better position to comment on the men because, quite frankly, seeing that some of them are scum is not rocket science. I'm constantly being 'educated' by women when i go to turkey about turkish men, generally by women who are with turks, as though i can't see what goes on and lack the ability to make my mind up on my own.
And Strawberry, you are wrong in saying that nothing you say will affect the decisions of others because it has affected me greatly. It is the posts on this topic that has made me basically finish things between me and my boyfriend, despite caring for him deeply.

Cemile

I'm somewhat saddened that you say you have finished with your boyfriend because of what has been said in this forum. You say you know your own mind then why would you let complete strangers influence you because that is what we are to you on this forum.

I genuinely think that the people giving advice here are doing it because they care (maybe I'm being naive)

Unfortunatley this is an open forum and if you post a question you must expect to get replys good and bad from other members

I wish you all the best in what the future bring you.

Lynn

BluePeter

I said I was no longer going to contribute towards this thread, but having read what you've (wrongly) said about me I feel the need to explain things to you in more simple terms.

Firstly, most of what people write in this forum is hearsay; they are saying what they think, or feel, or have heard - or have seen for themselves. And I have seen for myself how many of these men behave. I'm sure you will understand that.

Secondly, I never said, and I quote your words: " every man who takes his wife into a bar in turkey should be frightened to go to the toilet in case the waiter passes her a phone number and ends up around the back for a knee jerker ,her words" I said that SOME of these men flirt with women behind their husbands' backs, and that, yes, SOME women flirt back and end up in long-term affairs. If you read it properly you wll learn.

Doepsmc is absolutely correct in her evaluation of you: you just want to disagree with everything either I say, or she says. Your problem - not ours.

Furthermore, why do I need to be in a failed relationship with a Turkish man to know the way that many of them treat the women they meet? I'm sure you're well aware of the behaviour of certain people - but that doesn't mean to say that you yourself behave like that. Does that make sense to you?

Quite frankly, I think you should calm down, and not let this subject get on top of you.

Strawberry

I do know my own mind, a little too well; i'm so head strong sometimes i think i do need to listen to people. But maybe i was a little hasty. It's just that the posts on here seemed to be a lot more negative than positive and it was really bringing me down. I really do love him but i've been told so many times that at 18 you have no idea of what love is which is why i have been influenced by other people; i'm just trying to not get hurt, although its too late for that now. Maybe it's just to save face?

Strawberry, it may be wise for BluePeter to not let this topic get on top of him but its difficult for the likes of me to do that when feelings are involved I think you'll agree...

Cemile,

Of course people who have spent a lot of time in another country will have more knowledge about the place and its people than someone who only pops over there for the occasional holiday! You say you hate people with more experience of a place posting comments (at your request) and then in the next breath you are saying you've ended your relationship on account of ME!

If your feelings are that strong for your boyfriend nothing I or anyone else says will change that! Out of interest, how long exactly have you spent in his company?

I think it's extremely immature of you to blame me for you ending your friendship with this man. If what you say is correct, then the only reason you may be now having doubts about him is that you were indeed going to send him money. I can think of no other logical reason why you would end it. No-one would split up with someone they say they LOVE on account of a stranger's post on an internet site.

You say you're certain this man is a good person, and you seem convinced that BluePeter is right - so why didn't you take his advice rather than mine?

I cannot continue replying to you on this subject because I'm finding it tedious. I hope everything turns out well for you.

Strawberry